healing was preached today!
utterly blown away......
"healing is about compassion, not abt reputation."
bham! the arrow of conviction struck the bullseye of mi heart..
"we are not called to pray for the sick. we are called to HEAL the sick!"
wow! WOW!!!
mi mouth was hanging open...
revelations one after another jux hit me..
mi heart was beating so fast...
on top of tt,
there was dis pressure pressing and compressing mi innards...
i was on the verge of bursting..
hahaha! like a balloon!


throughout the svc,
i kept looking back at my past...
the charactor flaws tt He addressed...
the mani misconceptions and wrong attitudes tt He corrected...
all the diff seasons tt He has brought me thru...
smt frm inside jux screamed..
"look, look at the newly created u! compare nw wif last tym! there is a God and He did all tt for u! healing is another part of the package tt He wanna give u! tt hard to believe meh?!"
haha! this sounds comical!
but, throughout the whole svc..
dis thought jux kept pounding on me...

like wat mi mum always say...
it is perfectly reasonable to turn to the manufacturer when the manufactured product has any flaws or defects...
if the new toy tt u bought has a broken nose, u go to the toyshop/factory n get it fixed!
its the same wif God!
He "manufactured"us so its perfectly logical to go back to Him when there's any prob wif our bodies...
its great having a mum hu is so practical n down to earth...
there u haf it..
healing is as simple as tt...
period.

Wove Rainbows At Sunday, February 26, 2006

TADA!!! i'm back!!!!!!
exams are officially OVERrrrr!!!
yays!!
for the first tym in so mani sems,
i can say wif confidence tt i'm going to do SO well!!
for the 1st tym, i'm actually looking 4ward to getting back mi results!!!
PTL!!!!
looking back at the past wk, i cld nv NV haf survived w/o God!!!
i attended every single event there was...
cg, svc, sub-zone pm, church wide pm..u name it, i attended it...
wif fear n alot of worry i went...
doubting God and wondering whether He will honour mi sacrifice...
i struggled wif mi flesh which was shouting "you're insane" at me!
pple arnd me said the same...
well guys...God is true to His word!!!
"seek ye first His kingdom and His righteousness and ALL tings will be added unto u."
though tings seemed impossible; so little time, so much to cover...
but, God proved Himself to be the God above all situations!!
i asked for strength and peace...
He gave me strength, the perfect peace, perfect joy and perfect love of Jesus...
not a single ounce of fear...onli a wonderful sense of urgency and great purpose!!
i cldn't even imagine having joy in the midst of exams but He gave it to me...

as the song goes....
more den i cld hope or dream of...
You have poured ur favour on me!!!
one day in the hse of God is,
better den a thousand days in the world!!
Amen and Amen!!!

mi studying season is over!!!!
tym to harvest!!!
YEAH!!!
mi mum was so blessed by the svc!!
seeing her praise n worship God beside me....
man! i was filled wif so many mixed feelings...
holding her hand n bringing her to the far end of the auditorium where we sat was......
simply amazing!!
suddenly, mi vocab seems so limited...
words can't describe how i feel...
jux dis warm, fuzzy feeling knowing tt God is in control...
realli looking 4ward to seeing her planted and growing in an adult cg!!!
as God leads...=)

wat an amazing wk it has been!!!
the diff seasons in our lives revel God to us...
how true!
not onli has God shown Himself to be Jehovah Jireh, God mi provider..
He is also Jehovah Nissi, the Lord mi banner...

yeah!
bed time for me now!!!
peace guys!

Wove Rainbows At Saturday, February 25, 2006

heeeheee...
its mi little break tym from studying!
its great to be online blogging again i mux say!!!

exams are going to end in another 2 days tym!
yays!
n.....*drumroll*
mi mum promised to buy me another guitar!!
cool eh...
for wat occasion?
she's buying it becox she loves me...
she's also going to buy me a genuine addidas jacket nx wk!!
for wat?
for doing well in mi exams!
mi results will onli be out in like 3 wks tym..
but she's getting it for me nx wk!!
"i noe you're going to do so well! i haf faith in you n God! so dun need to wait for ur results to cum out...i buy for u first..." -mi mum-
wow! blown away......
parents always say IF you're first in dis, IF you get A star...den i buy u dis...den i get u tt...
mi mum defeated all logic!!!
hahaha! i'm so blessed!!
way to go mum!!!!
i'm goin to do the same for mi kids nx tym!


realli thank God for healing mi family....
it used to be world war 4 at hme...
adults fighting among themselves, kids quarreling...
nv a moment of peace...
vulgarities n crude words spilling everywhere...
guess mani of u haf gone thru the same ting b4...
well, all tings do work out for the gd of those who love God!
i questioned and wondered...i hated...i rebelled...
now i noe...God had a plan...
mi mum will be joining me for fri's svc!!!
praying tt mi dad will cum too!!
no more backsliding for the xu family!!!


had an overnight talky wif mi mum 1-2 days ago...
conclusion:
mi mum understands me the best in dis world!
i'm a highly excitable person hu sometimes do n say tings out of impulse...
often, mi intentions cum out the wrong way giving pple the wrong idea...
pple look at the actions n the words tt i say n draw conclusions frm them...
thus, wrong impressions are formed leading to misunderstandings n wat not...
but, mi mum looks beyond wat i say n do...
she looks at mi heart...=)

if u realli want to understand a person,
dun jux look at wat they do n say, look deeper...
its the heart...
yes, "out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks"...
out of abundance of joy n excitement i do say n do the wrong tings also..
though words are misused, but the intentions behind it are out of the abundance of the heart..
tink tts wat tt verse means...

hearing her tok abt mi future...
man! she is willing to bet her everyting on her daughter, me!
she believes in me so much!!
looking at the tings she does and says,
i realli dun deserve it...
her love secures n assures me...
it sweeps through mi heart, n overflows over the edges like a waterfall..
looking at mi mum gifs me new revelations abt God's love...
talking to her makes me fall in love wif God all over again...
i can't stop wondering...
if a creation can love me like tt, wat abt mi creator?
wow!
indeed, like the song says,
who can fantom the dephs of Your love?

wif such support frm mi Greatest Cheerleader n mi mum cheering right beside Him,
wat are exams man?
devil, watch it!
i'm going to kick ur ass!!!!

Wove Rainbows At Wednesday, February 22, 2006

amist the songs of worship,
the feeling of inadequacy enveloped me,
in my sorrow and desperateness,
Your voice pierced mi soul...
"give me your limitations..wat little you haf, I'll use it.."
prying the seal,
You showed me the cross...
"nail your limitations and ur fears there..."
i dragged the heavy bag of emotions n left it there at the cross of calvary..
mi heart literally fluttered wif relief...
the bags were too big n heavy for me..
i put dwn the big ones n took up a small handcarrier...
i wld need tt handcarrier to bring me to mi nx level...


i am weak, but You are strong...
wat i can do, i thank You for using...
wat i cannot do, i thank You for empowering me...
wateva distorted reflection i see of myself,
i thank You for looking thru the mirror of mi flesh into wat lies inside..

"In the multitude of my anxieties within me,
Your comforts delight my soul."
-Psalm 94:19-


i decrease, You increase..

Wove Rainbows At Sunday, February 12, 2006

fear cripples...
fear wearies...
fear paralyzes ur being...

we can pray, we can worship and feel comforted and at peace in God's presence...
but, when you're out of ur closet and facing the same probs,
fear creeps in and v soon you're worrying abt dis n discouraged abt tt...

veh soon you'll start wondering y isn't tings getting better...
y isn't ur faith increasing, ur fear decreasing?
y isn't God cuming to ur rescue?
y does He leave u there crying w/o picking u up?
y y y y y y?
haven't u followed the standard sos procedure?
pray, worship, read a verse...
has God left u?

haha!
i'm so glad to say He hasn't...
perhaps, He is there standing in a corner of ur room shaking His head and smiling...
perhaps, He is hugging u and drying ur tears...
perhaps, He is strengthening u and moulding the edges...
so mani perhaps..
but 1 ting is for sure, He hasn't left u...

so do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you.
-Isaiah 41:10-

again, i'm going back to the basics...
revelation for me...
not jux worshipping, praying and reading a verse...
but confessing the verse and meditating on it...
its amazing wat God can do for you when u stand upon His word and His promises..

"going back to the basics is boring"
if ur basics isn't strong,
how to move on?
the basics now, is a revelation to me...
restructuring, reshaping, re-laying of foundation..
lay more cement...change the bricks...upgrade the tiles...
when the building collapses,
upgrading of the foundation occurs...
don't rush at dis part...
if the job is not well-done, it will still topple over at the nx storm..
more to conquer...
more to overcome...
more to learn...
more!

Wove Rainbows At Thursday, February 09, 2006

"i dunno wat is the prob..
i dunno why tings are like tt..
i dunno why i keep getting scolded...
i dunno y she treats me like tt..."

mi friend told me tt wif tears streaming down her cheeks...
i'm realli sad to see her dis way...
becox, the greatest enemy is herself...
the biggest battle she's fighting is within...
all i can do is to tok to her, love her, encourage her...
but, the transformation can onli tk place if she listens and acknowledges the prob and is willing to change...
often, becox of our pride we refuse to acknowledge our own frailties n limited abilities...
we haf dis barrier tt screams, "i am gd enuff, i am right, i don't need to change, u need to change!"
tt barrier blocks advice, love and pushes pple away...
the person inside gets lonely becox v soon, pple stop cuming in becox of the barrier..
the lonely person starts becuming a bitter wan and soon, a monster emerges frm within...
life becums messed up becox of a barrier...
scary rite?


so, wat shd we do when we see a person wif a barrier like tt?
do we gif up and jux walk away aftr getting hurt?
"if its not fruitful, jux gif it up..wat for waste ur time?"
yes, i agree..
but is it the best way?
is there no other alternatives?
wat if the person turns into a monster aftr u walk away?
even gold can be melted at veh high temp..
even diamonds can be destroyed at high heat..
which material on earth is indestructable?
i believe the same lies wif our barriers...
no heart is too hard for sincere love to penetrate n soften...
no hurt is too deep for the plaster of genuine love to cover n heal...
but, two question remains...
"can we afford the time?"
"are we willing to put in the effort?"

we mux be wise enuff to noe which to hang on to, which to let go...
if we let go of the wrong ones,
we're depriving the person of a chance to bloom...
if we hold on to the wrong ones,
we're draining ourselves of our strength n limiting our energy to do tings which can bless others...
haha...
not a penny, but 4 paragraphs for mi thoughts...

Wove Rainbows At Sunday, February 05, 2006

my cup overflows with grace...
my cup drips with mercy...
my cup runs over wif love & forgiveness...
it doesn't matter if i dun haf dis or i'm not like tt...
wat i haf, i'll not exchange for anything in e world!

=D

i've nv known the extent of God's acceptance towards us until joyce meyer said smt tt totally blew me away...
its still ringing so loudly in mi head...
she said tt our little flaws n attitute probs are actually sighted by God as smt unique tt mks us distinct..
well, i can totally relate to tt because.......
i haf dis friend hu has serious BO...
wat is unique is, dis friend is a gal...
when pple mention her name, the first ting tt will cum to mi mind is her BO...
its the same wif God...amazing rite?
i wonder wats the first ting tt cums to God's mind when He tinks of me...
hahaha...maybe i'll ask Him when i get to heaven...=p


re-read max lucado's 'travelling light' bk...
absolutely love dis sentence...
"God rather die for u then live w/o u"
a short sentence which speaks a thousand words...
lovely...

Wove Rainbows At Wednesday, February 01, 2006