the world arnd me seems to be goin crazy...
pple are turning more freaky...
not to mention,
the moodswings n diff hormonal change stages in life...
the once sure-fire way to avoid conflicts by tolerating ceases to work...
guess, too much friction has made the string thin to the point of breakage...
stability and security is wat i desire most now...


dis cny has been the worst in mi history of 18 yrs...
all the rules were broken...
no cursing, no quarreling, no screaming n shouting, no tears...
see wat mishandled emotions n disappointment can lead to?
aftr all tt has been said n done,
i still love the xu family..tts all tt matters...
love covers a multitude of sins...
and wif love, forgiveness always finds its way round...


how u start will determine how u end..
frm the start of the yr till now (according to the english calendar),
its been v stormy n uncomfortable 4 me...
i jux noe tt dis yr is going to be a yr full of trials n tribulations..
i'm uncertain, yes, even fearful but one ting's for sure...
the shepherd will lead me thru the steep ravines n narrow ledges to the green pastures...
i will stand on ur word n promises...
for u are faithful..

Wove Rainbows At Tuesday, January 31, 2006

pple, i'm on a quest...
a quest to lose at least 5kg!!!
pray tt the fats will lessen ok?!
haha!


svc yest was awesome!
i felt so diff when i was worshipping...
it was no longer abt me connecting to God or u connecting to God as an individual
but, it was we connecting to Him as a family..
it seemed strange to me at first becox the audi is so big
and there mux be thousands and tens of thousands of pple tt i've nv seen or met b4..
still, it felt like a big big family!
waves upon waves of support jux surrounded and swept past me...


fellowship was also great!!!
the small clicks are 'disbanding' and the cg is becuming more like one big family!
seeing the members care for one another realli floods mi heart wif joy and relief...
our love is definately growing, spreading and increasing!
God is good!
He always arrives jux in time to encourage and assure...


nx wk is cny alreadi!!!
more tym spent wif family...
i'm glad!
blood is indeed thicker den water and we can always count on our family to be there even when no one is...
they are one big big pillar in our lives!!

there u haf it!
family is definately impt!!!

Wove Rainbows At Sunday, January 22, 2006

learnt abit more abt myself dis wk...
tink i'm a pretty emo person..
when i'm high, i get over the top..
when i'm down, i sink until cannot see...
yea..these are the traits of an emo person...
so, beware of the mood swings!!! haha!!
tts why i deleted mi past 2 entries...
they were composed by mua when i was mental..

anywayz, learnt smt realli gd today!!
its the importance of a point of reference in every area of our lives!!!

rmb the show one-leg kicking?
the show tt lee guo huang and sharon ow acted in?
in tt show,
lee guo huang (LGH) was this ah beng who was jux released from prison..
he had trouble controlling his temper and wld get angry and provoked veh easily...
each time he gets agitated, he will becum extremely violent..
sharon ow acted as LGH's lover...(smt along tt line)
to help LGH curb his temper,
she angered LGH on purpose one night..
when he was going to get violent,
she tiptoed and kissed him...
tt was his point of reference!!!
frm tt day onwards,
whenever LGH got angry,
he would tink of tt kiss n his anger wld simmer...

sis xw shared dis wif me today...
indeed, its so true!!!
when we're on the verge of backsliding,
we need a point of reference to remind us of the goodness of God...
when we're abt to sink into depression,
we need a point of reference to steer us away frm dwelling on the unhappy tings...
when we're lazy n unmotivated to study,
we need a point of reference to get our geer moving...
every area, a point of reference is needed!

going to search and record down all mi points of references...
yays! =)

though pastor aries delivered a sermon on point of reference b4,
i needed tt reminder...
guess, we're all programmed to be like dis huh...
even though we've passed a certain level,
we still need to reach back to our foundation once a while and grab hold of simple truths such as "God loves you" n "God will never leave u", which is realli the cement tt secures the whole skyscraper..
tts why when we go thru tough times,
the ting tt keeps us going is not the level tt we've reached or our 'achievements'..
rather,
its our love for God n our conviction!
tts when building ceases and strenghtening is done!

its definately back to the basics for me...

Wove Rainbows At Friday, January 20, 2006

Does God exist?

A man went to a barber shop to have his hair and his beard cut as always.
He started to have a good conversation with the barber who attended him.
They talked about so many things and various subjects.
Suddenly, they touched the subject of God.
The barber said:"Look man, I don't believe that God exists as you say so.""
Why do you say that?" - Asked the client.
Well, it's so easy, you just have to go out in the street to realize that God does not exist.
Oh, tell me, if God existed,would there be so many sick people?
Would there be abandoned children?
If God existed, there would be no suffering nor pain.
I can't think of a God who permits all of these things."
The client stopped for a moment thinking but he didn't want to respond so as to prevent an argument.
The barber finished his job and the client went out of the shop.
Just after he left the barber shop he saw a man in the street with long hair and beard (it seems that it had been a long time since he had his cut and he looked so untidy).
Then the client again entered the barber shop and he said to the barber:"know what? Barbers do not exist."
"How come they don't exist?"-asked the barber."Well I am here and Iam a barber."
"No!" - the client exclaimed. "They don't exist because if they did there would be no people with long hair and beard like that man who walks in the street."
"Ah, barbers do exist, what happens is that people do not come to me."
"Exactly!"- affirmed the client.
"That's the point. God does exist, what happens is people don't go to Him and do not look for Him that's why there's so much pain and suffering in the world."
live passionately...laugh frequently...love extravagantly..

got this article from guitar4Christ...
haf been tinking quite alot abt this lately too...
wat a gd answer huh...

go check out the other articles at www.guitar4Christ.com!
they're all very well-written and encouraging!
especially, "THE CRUCIFIXION"!!!
so blessed by it!
but, din post it cox its rather long...
MUST check it out!
i'm offf!

Wove Rainbows At Saturday, January 14, 2006

dis sem has realli been a new beginning for me...
new friends, new subjects, new workload n all the other norm changes..
but i made it!!!
got back mi last paper for term test today!
cleared everything n even got an A!
PTL!!!
dis is the result of God's grace n the power of focus!!!


sec sch students,
dun run away frm ur sch work anymore!
serving God is impt, but so is ur sch work..
dun be so dependent on others to do ur work for u...
its ur responsibility n if u want to grow up, do it urself!


i realli regret wasting the past 2 sems playing away n poning lecs...
i failed almost every single subject..
i was interested in every other ting except mi studies...
mi n mi friends slowly drifted apart becox they wld be discussing abt sch work n lecs while i self-entertain as i wld haf no idea wat they're toking abt...
when it came to project work,
mi friends wld sometimes forget abt me cox i'm either not in sch or i'll be playing and not concentrating on the project...
i used to tink tt the reason why they study so hard is becox they haf no life n are boring pple!
but i realized tt if boring, fleshy pple could excel at their studies, why was i struggling to even pass?
they had or rather haf smt tt i didn't haf n tt is discipline...


wats so glorifying abt failing everyting?
wats so shiok abt being a loser?
pple will jux look down on u and above all,
how are they going to look at Father?


even if no one encourages me..
even if there is no one there to gif me a pat on mi back..
i still n i will still study hard..
not so much becox i want a gd cert since i want to be a piano teacher n not a nutritionist...
but, i study hard becox of Him!


if you can't even face the lion of ur studies,
how are u going to face the other lions in ur life?
stop running! go face it jux like Daniel did...

Wove Rainbows At Monday, January 09, 2006

joyce meyer came to preach today!
indeed,
its the little tings tt matter...
a revival is started by a small spark...
tears are stopped by a mere hug...

i've been kindda dry n burdened lately...
tinking abt alot of tings tt i shdn't be tinking of...
and getting miself distracted n stuff...
God reminded me again of mi purpose by a card given by joa...
a lil card,
but i was realli encouraged by it!
thanks gal!

so mani lil tings tt i've brushed aside...
the daily smses by joyce..=)
she nv fails to remind me tt i'm thought of n loved...
always looking out for every possible opportunity to bless me n mk me happy...
the assurance of acceptance she always gives...
i realli thank God for u gal!

lotsa tings i wanna say...
shall say it when i'm feeling better...
now, abit emo...
=)

Wove Rainbows At Sunday, January 08, 2006